“Eight Steps to Taking Control of Any and Every Circumstance That Affects Your Life!”

8 ways of taking control of your life

We are all gladiators in life, whether we like it or not. We enter a social environment in which there is no way out when we go to sleep and find ourselves in the same setting when we awake.

We are met with difficulty after difficulty, we are confined by walls, and a crowd of onlookers jeers, sneers, or applauds as we struggle.

New conflicts confront us on a daily basis, regardless of whether or not we are prepared for them and whether or not we want them. We have no choice but to tackle one challenge after another as they arise because life forces us to do so.

What we do have the ability to decide, though, is whether we choose to be the winner or the victim in this gladiator match.

Being a victim in this social arena is synonymous with having negative interactions with other people.

The vast majority of individuals are victims, victims of their own biases and prejudices.
This is because most individuals do not cultivate their own distinct and genuine selves and do not listen to their selves. They rather let the mental spectators that are rattling about in their thoughts, which are like tiny dictators, to tell them second by second how to fight their fights and what they can and cannot do. These dictators both clap and hiss, they both encourage and discourage, and they both encourage and discourage.

These mental observers are the recollections of the decisions made by actual individuals in the world. Take, for instance, the recollection of your aunt telling you, “I hope you marry someone rich, because you’re not going far on wits,” as an illustration. It’s the reverberation of your father muttering, “You’ve got a back problem—no spine,” over and over again.

It is impossible to overstate the impact that they have on the relationships in your life.
The opinions of millions of people’s mental spectators are taken as gospel, and as a consequence, their lives are plagued with mediocrity because of the decisions they’ve made based on those opinions.

The fact that there are so many people living in this manner raises the question of whether or not this is the way that I am required to live. The fortunate answer is that it is not, but you can if you want to.

After you have recognized your mental spectators and the ways in which you engage with them, you will be able to transition from the position of victim to that of a conqueror.
There are eight phases involved in gaining command, and these are eight actions that may be used to almost any circumstance in which you want to see a change. You have the power to have a good impact on any part of your life, including the quality of your relationships and the career opportunities available to you.

Let’s take a look at the steps, shall we?

1. Identify the source of your problems.

Inquire, “What’s the matter with me?” Am I an anxious rat that allows myself to feel resentment when other people get what I want for myself? Am I being depressed and whiny? Anxiety ridden? Moody? Which of the following? You will not be successful if you skip this step. Finding out what’s wrong with you is the first step to getting better, but it will need some personal bravery on your part.

2. Find Out What the Effects Are.

Ask yourself how your difficulties are hurting your life. Do you think I’m a bad parent, a nerd with no friends, a backstabber, a slut, an alcoholic, or a junkie? Am I none of the aforementioned, but rather someone who falls short of what I am capable of becoming? This phase demands you to be completely truthful with yourself, but in the end, the truth will help you break free.

3. Investigate the Original.

Ask yourself this question: “Where did all of my problems come from?” Who, exactly, are the members of both my actual and my imagined audiences?
What do the people in my head look like, what do they say, and what do they do? Who or what is it exactly that is preventing me from taking control of my life? It’s possible that you’re about to have one of the most amazing moments of your life. You will gaze into the void and discover who is there to meet your gaze.

4. Identify Your Role.

Consider the question, “How have my actions contributed to my problems?” I’m trying to figure out where I stand in this whole situation and what my obligations are.

Did I elect to be a garbage disposal? Do I put myself through hell in an effort to make other people happy? Should I hold myself to certain standards that are unreasonable?

What kind of relationship do I have with the person that I am? Do I give my mental spectators the power to distract me, bring me down, make me angry, or make me anxious?

The first step in knowing oneself and gaining personal mastery is an important if terrifying realization that you play a part in creating your own troubles.

5. Be clear about what you want.

Ask yourself, “What am I especially interested in doing to fix my problems?” Do I want to live my life as a doormat, a slut, an alcoholic, or a geek with no friends? Or do I want to be the master of my own audience?

Do I have the desire to defend myself against a spectator, whether they are real or imagined? Do I want to be in charge of my own education, my money account, and the connections I have in my life? You will continue to be a victim until you are able to really state your desires in the order of how important they are to you. Once you have accomplished this, though, you will be well on your road to achieving victory.

6. Consider your options.

Ask yourself, what choices do I have, and how should I prioritize them among the available alternatives? Which of the available choices need to be my primary focus to begin with? Which one is the second? Which one is it? If you wake up with a hangover most mornings that saps your spirit, you may want to consider ditching your drinking companions in favor of more genuine friendships.

The second thing you should do is put the money that you would typically spend on going out to bars into a college fund for either yourself or your children. If, on the other hand, you’re a workaholic who longs to spend more time with his or her children, you should go ahead and make it happen.

On their final day, very few people have stated something along the lines of, “If I could live my life over again, I’d spend more time working and less time with the people I love.” You have options and alternatives to consider, and after doing so, you may make decisions that reflect who you are as an individual. This is taking the initiative. If you carry out these steps, you will start to acquire genuine power.

7. Educate Yourself on Strategies That Win.

Ask yourself, how can I maintain order among both my physical and my mental spectators? Should I just crumple to the ground when they give me the thumbs down sign? How can I learn to take leadership on every level and regain control of my life at the same time? Even if there is no “magic” involved, you may get the impression that there is. You are in control of your own destiny, as opposed to being a defeated gladiator who is at the mercy of the audience.

8. Get Your Relationships Under Control.

Ask yourself, what else can I do to develop myself and my views in order to have better control over my relationships? How can I take charge right now in the process of building my own identity and sense of self-worth? Congratulations! You are focusing your efforts on the only person in the entire world that you have any control over: yourself. And the more you work on bettering yourself, the more your relationships with other people and the environment around you will benefit from those changes.

Even though this is simply a quick summary of each of the eight stages for jump-starting your relationships and taking charge of your life, you would be shocked at how important the consequences of a few tiny alterations in perception can be.


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